Thursday, July 19, 2012

Centering a Universe

Patience is a virtue, or so they say.  And so, virtuous I am not.  I am always waiting for something. Right now, its for this little tiny baby girl growing in my tummy.  I am so anxious to meet her.  To breathe in the scent of my newborn, to nurse her, to stare in awe at her perfect little fingers and nose.  To not be pregnant anymore, and just get on with it.  Get on with life, with getting to know this little being, with moving forward and finding a family groove.


But then, there's this other little girl.


And I want time to come to a screeching halt.  I want to soak up every single second, every word, every smile, every hug, kiss and snuggle.  She's changing so much, becoming this amazing little human right before our eyes.  This little human that we focus every ounce of our energy on right now.  This time we have together right now with her, alone, is so fleeting.  Anna will become one of two pieces, that make up the center of our world.  Our time will be divided.

I can't help but feel guilty about making her share the center of the universe with someone else. But, then I remind myself that this "someone else" is her sister.  Someone she will, hopefully, love sharing the world with.  Maybe she will be as awestruck as Mace and I by the new human living in our home.  Maybe she won't even notice that the balance has shifted.  I do not remember a time before my sister, and I was 5 when she was born.  In my memory, she has always been there.  I know in my heart that the same will be true for Anna.

Still, I am scared of the transition.  I realize I am wholly relying on myself to center Anna's universe for her, and this I cannot do.  I can be there to love her, to help her recognize her feelings, to guide her.  But the rest is up to her.  It sounds ridiculous to put the weight of that on a two year-old, but I suspect the reality of it is much less dramatic than what is going on in my head.  Families make the transition from one-to-two every single day in this world with little consequence, except probably a whole lot more love and joy in their lives.

So, for now, I will embrace that so called virtue and be patient.  I will soak up our last solo months with Anna, smother her with love, and when the day arrives, I will suddenly have two beautiful girls to smother with love.  And life will still be pretty damn good.

Our family of (almost) 4.  Taken by our dear friend Hope.


17 comments:

  1. Awww! So sweet. Your little one is so adorable and I know when she's older she def. won't remember a time pre-sister (I was 2.5 when my brother was born) and even if there are some growing pains I know she'll love her sister and be so excited :)

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  2. I love Anna's one shoe on one shoe off in that last one. You are doing all the things you know to do and that makes them the right things. Enjoy this time!

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  3. Sweet Maggie! First of all, you look fabulous! I love the pic of your baby bump :) Second, Anna is so cute!! (swoon) Thanks so much for sharing these! MISS YA! xoxo

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  4. Your daughter is just gorgeous, and I'm sure the new daughter will be too. Enjoy this time!

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  5. How cute is your family?!?!?!?! So Happy for you Maggie!

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  6. Your family is simply beautiful my friend - each and everyone is such a treasure :)
    I'm sure you will all be fine :D

    Cheers
    Choc Chip Uru

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  7. Oh my gosh this is so exciting! Your beautiful baby will love to have a little one around, especially with such a lovely set of parents :) Looking forward to hearing all about it.

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  8. Awwwww... What a sweet posting! You have such a lovely family !

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  9. Awwwww... What a sweet posting! You have such a lovely family !

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  10. Lovely family!!!! your daughter is a precious treasure, all my blessing for the new baby to come.

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  11. Maggie, it is really nice to hear what a mother has to say. Unable to wait for one and wishing another to always stay a child. it would be nice when the day comes, your little kiddos could read this :)

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  12. Your daughter is so pretty. You make a gorgeous family. Going from 1 to 2 kids will be easy for you because you have a pure heart. xx

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  13. So sweet. What a beautiful family you have!

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  14. Oh Congratulations Maggie! What a wonderful gift to have. That is a beautiful picture of you all and hopefully your precious curly headed girl will enjoy the new addition :)

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  15. Congrats! you have a lovely family, that little girl of yours is sooo cute!

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  16. That pic of your little girl is gorgeous, I hope you frame it!!

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